Life is confusing; It is intriguing. It is beautiful.

Life has a strange rhythm; It has the oddest concoctions that stayed as a mystery waiting to be solved. In the most amazing way, if we were ever present enough to realize, we find interesting potions of happiness mixed with anxiety, sadness stirred in hope, and exhilaration that ends with emptiness. Once in a while, coincidences that happen amazes us, or fate that entwines some people together surprises us. In many whiles, lessons are taught in the most unexpected situations, battles are won with the greatest loss, and in despair, we find the side we never thought we have in us to fight on. At every turn, we are presented with a whole new side of the world, sights we never knew existed. But it has the strangest rhythm, you’d never anticipate things that’ll come next. Not entirely. 

Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans. It throws you off track, invites you to get grumpy over foiled plans, but also provide an alternative of unexpected scenic views and an adventurous ride – only if you look up. Maybe sometimes it’s easier to go with the flow. Or maybe not but that is up to you. Riding the waves can be fun, but so can running against the wind. Sugar can get you adrenaline rush, but the bitterness of the coffee can equally perk you up. While new purchases can bring you excitement, the old stuff can give you solace. While you can party whole night and jump with the crowd, you can also bask in the moonlight and enjoy the serenity it encompasses. Really, it’s all about what makes you feel alive and doing exactly so.

Life’s very much like a picture; Just sometimes you get a better picture if you stay out of the picture. Sometimes the more you try to squeeze yourself into the frame that is already full, you get caught in the commotion and miss the opportunity to flash your greatest smile. But if the picture’s a little empty, fill it with your presence and make sure it comes out great!

Life’s more like fiction than a non-fiction book. Non-fiction books go chapter to chapter discussing different topics; There is no rule that says you must read in order. It gets brutal sometimes. You can be told in chapter 2 that if you’re not doing this then you’re failing in life. In chapter 20, it’ll still be the same: You fail if you’re not this or that. In fiction books it’s different. It is all about the characters we are introduced in chapter one, the invitation to venture along with them and see how they’ll come to rise above setbacks. It is all about story progression and lessons learned out of it. Reading and delving into the book like we are part of the story, it gets personal. And in chapter 2 even if we fail, it doesn’t matter. If it does, it brings the strength in us to fight harder and become who we will be in chapter 20. It is always about progression and the journey in and of it itself. 

Life is more than what we see. However high the man-made buildings are, the sky’s higher. However wide our visions are, the horizon’s wider. However deep we fall into the depths of despair, the sea’s deeper. In times of need, nature will always a good reminder of what life is, of the time we have, of the scale we are. Seek opportunities to view the sky, find time to soak in the midst of nature, search for joy and gratitude from within. 

It’s about being present. It’s the first step toward everything else. And when we do, when we get present in the present, when we finally open our eyes to the world, there are many things that could turn bad days around. These are some of those I’ve slowly learned to be grateful for:

Sometimes its the traffic that flows in my favor, the train that arrives in the platform right on time.
Sometimes it’s the 5% battery life that amazingly lasted me through the journey back home.
Sometimes it’s the ‘Thank you’ that I say to people that garnered simple replies like ‘You’re Welcome’.
Sometimes it’s the rain that stops so I could then go through with my plan to go jogging.
Sometimes it’s the last bowl of noodle that they have and that I’ve bought. 
Sometimes it’s the song that played over the radio.
Sometimes it’s the peaceful night after a hectic day. 
Many times, it’s nothing fanciful; it’s simple. 
Many times, life can be simple. 

Life is confusing, mysterious, and intriguing. 
Life is sometimes also brutal, tough, and ridiculously unreasonable.
Life is sometimes also scenic, peaceful, and beautiful.
Life is beating on an erratic heartbeat. 
But always know that it’s beating for you. 

Coincidences in Life.

This happened a year ago, my journalling app reminded me.

As I was scrolling through the entries I’ve written a year ago, something caught my eye. I did a double take, and I shuddered at it for the second time in my life. Maybe it was nothing much, or maybe it was something I’ve been oblivious about, but I was then convinced that coincidences are a real thing – incidences like these made me think about them seriously.

On this day, a year ago, I went to a public library, unplanned. I browsed through the shelves and casually decided on a book to bring it home. At night, as I flipped through the pages, on the introduction section, I was shocked. It was today’s date imprinted on it, just 36 years ago.

There it wrote, ” On January 13, 1982, a tragedy occurred just outside Washington, D.C. More than six inches of snow fell at Ronald Reagan International. The airport was closed for most of the morning and reopened at noon. Air Florida Flight 90 had already been severely delayed when the captain had to make a choice about whether or not to take off… “. It was about the tragedy where the airplane crashed into the 14th Street Bridge across the Potomac River in Washington, immediately after takeoff in a severe snowstorm.

It obviously got to me; I was a little creeped out, but then I was amazed. Had a hard time deciding on how I was feeling about this coincidence, and then I settled for the latter: amazement. It still amazes me today, how out of all the books, and out of all the days in a year, it happened just right on this day, exactly 36 years ago.

I didn’t take note of the title of the book (still new to journalling at that time), nor could I remember whether I’ve finished reading that book. What stayed with me was the date of the tragedy that struck Washington 37 years ago and took 78 lives with it and the coincidence that happened a year ago.

Maybe coincidences are meant to be reminders in life, a little nudge to attract our attention to somewhere it needs to be, a remembrance of the past, an indication of the future. Or it might be nothing at all.

Tonight we grieve for those who lost their lives to this unfortunate tragedy. It’s the only thing that we could do: to remember.

Setting Up Resolutions, 2019.

This is about searching back youth, building confidence and have trust in the future. This is a map drawn into the future, paving ways towards what we hope to achieve this year and the years that follow. This is about not giving up on dreams and making sure that we live each day, purposefully and excitingly. This is me trying.

The first week of the year, it is a good time to lay down the ground rules and goals.

(A) On Work.

It takes conscious effort to stay committed to finding thrill in every working day, every ounce of energy to make sure things get done the way it should, aiming for something close to perfection, putting your heart and soul into becoming better today than yesterday, and this year than the year before.

Leaving excuses behind, however easily we lament about ‘Oh, this is nothing like my dream job!’, or ‘This was a job I held on because I had no choice to’, or ‘I had never wanted to walk down this path’, we leave it behind.

Here we are, for the days forward that we’ll have to face, at least let yourself be on your side, invite excitement in and chase boredom out. You might find new emotions associated with working (or improving at what you do).

” Do what you have to until you can do whatever you want to do.” – Oprah Winfrey

And before you can do whatever you want to, knowing that you have to do what you have to do, might as well, take in the scenery and enjoy the ride.

(B) Hobby and Passion.

This is tricky. A few years ago, I had no hobby to call my own, no dreamy passion to chase after, and I was ‘happy’ adopting a passive attitude and let the free time just breeze by. I didn’t particularly enjoy doing anything, and searching for one that is was hard. So i let it slide.

Today I have a full list of hobbies I’d like to venture, passions that I’d like to pursue. Yet it could come as overwhelming, given time as a constraint and energy as a limited resource. Maximizing the output (your happiness and achieving some form of success set by yourself) will be the goal. So i had it filtered down to a few.

  1. Journalling and Writing.

    When I write, it feels like I am in another world. I enjoy the peace and serenity that comes along with penning down fleeting thoughts and keeping a record on my life. Because of writing, I had started living more consciously, feeling emotions a little deeper, and seeing things that I’ve never noticed before. So I’ll keep writing, and this year, I’ll want to work on improving my language ability and writing skills. Complete a course on writing, read more books, write more stuff and enjoy!

  2. Photography.

    This is something new to me. A rather reckless decision to splurge on a camera, I’d want to make sure I am getting money worth out of this by learning how to use it and using it well. I have no idea what the best combination of iso-shutterspeed-aperture is for every situation, or how the pictures will come out when I take them, or whether I’d lose the moment in between while I change the settings and adopting the trial-and-error method, but I think it doesn’t matter just yet. I’ll go in as a beginner, take lots of shots, wreck up the settings, and then learn from there. Anyhow, I reckon it’ll be so much fun!

  3. Health and fitness.

    This is not so much a passion, but rather, an intentional act of treating myself better so i can feel better at any moment. Exercising sufficiently and eating healthier options (most of the time) to keep the mind sharp, the health in mint condition, and keeping sickness at bay to have more time for enjoyment. This is for the others.

  4. Reading.

    Last year, I fell short of this goal. This year, I’m setting the same benchmark, 40 books for a year, averaging 3.33 books a month. It’ll be challenging (my best record was 28), but then heck excuses. I’m determined to start with the right mindset- by believing that I can do it.  And I’ve already started on my first book, so yes let’s keep the momentum going!

  5. Blogging.

    Last year, somehow I’ve started this blog. It was something that I had always wanted to do but then procrastinated for later (which the later didn’t come until October last year). I gave a lot of thoughts into how I want my first post to look like, pouring in hours to just write sentences and then delete it after, and also choosing a fancy picture so it’ll feel, well fancy. The thrill was definitely there – the first post, and then the second and then the third and all that follows. It feels like I have something to call my own. And then somewhere along the path, I thought it’ll be so much more meaningful if I’ll put in pictures that I’ve taken myself (however unfanciful it is). I’ve done that ever since the fourth post and I’ll want it to continue. My direction to take? It’ll be a writing journey, sprinkled with a whole lot of sincerity.

This is me trying. To wake up with excitement every day, to work hard on dreams and make them come true, to stay true to myself along the ups and downs, and to fight hard, stand tall and never give up hope.

Life’s an interesting journey, only for those who try. More than just resolutions, they are now our pathways onto chasing dreams and hunting down passions. This year will be good to us, it’ll be fun, so hop on the ride! Thank you for reading! 🙂